The Matrix IS Real

There is a cat that hangs out on the back porches of all the townhouses in my particular tract (Building 8). I'm 99% positive this cat is a stray. The cat is white and fluffy, with fur that's kind of dirty and a little matted. In my experience, dirty, white, and fluffy cats are bitches. I used to have one...her name was Rascal. Not only was she bitchy, but she was a slut. In fact, she was such a sex fiend that she had kittens with her own kitten. And those kittens were retarded. Not severely, but they never grew very big and acted strange. (I know cats usually act strange, but stranger than the normal amount of strangeness.) But my bitchy, slutty cat has nothing to do with this.

So, there's this white cat. I've been here since September 2007. I've seen that cat a million times. I've only ever seen that particular white, fluffy cat. And then, this past New Year's Eve, I saw two dirty, white, and fluffy cats hanging out near our neighbor's back porch. It reminded of that scene in The Matrix when Neo sees that black cat walking by the doorway twice. So, I come inside and tell John that there's just been a glitch in the matrix. I tell him what happened and he laughs. It just seemed so appropriate being New Year's Eve and everything. Since then, I have not seen the original white cat's doppelganger. I determined it really was a glitch in the matrix, but at that point I really had no idea about how right I was.

Fast forward to a few days ago. We see the white cat sitting at the front of John's parking space as we return from the grocery store. As we pulled into the space the cat ran off and I asked John if he remembered when I witnessed the glitch in the matrix. Jokingly, John said he wished the cat had never even existed. I said he just tell the guy who invented the matrix to make the cat so that it had not existed. We had a laugh. We went inside. I came back out to smoke a cigarette about an hour later. I'm just standing outside my front door, minding my own business, when I see this BLACK fluffy cat come out of the bushes. And I have not seen the white cat since.

We are in the matrix. Believe it. The cats don't lie.